Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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