He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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