Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
