i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
