He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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