Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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