Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
