So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Everything about him screamed your future.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
