I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize