East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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