Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
