I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize