wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Randomize
