Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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