i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize