ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize