we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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