The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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