i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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