If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
