Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
