Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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