i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
