You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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