You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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