For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
