dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize