He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
