if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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