I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize
