We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
no. you can't hotbox the world.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
