I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Randomize