ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
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