quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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