yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
