What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize