Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
