she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
