I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
