butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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