I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
