He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Randomize
