That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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