you would pick up someone in the library
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize