I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
