honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I just had sex on a roof
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
