He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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