Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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