If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
