I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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