Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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