Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Randomize
