Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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